Humor

Dive into the uncharted depths of cosmic horror romance with "Eldritch Attraction: The Forbidden Mad Love of a Cthulhuian Woman," a darkly captivating guide that transcends the boundaries of reality and delves into the mysterious world of love beyond human comprehension. From navigating interdimensional courtship rituals to exploring the psychological impact of an otherworldly romance, this book offers an unparalleled glimpse into the enigmatic realm of Cthulhuian relationships. As you journey through the pages of this enthralling how-to guide, you'll be captivated by a series of diary entries that follow the haunting and unforgettable love story of a human protagonist and their alluring Cthulhuian partner. Together, they defy the odds and face the unimaginable in a tale that blends cosmic horror, dark humor, and the power of love to transcend even the most insurmountable obstacles. Brace yourself for a love story that will take you to the furthest reaches of the cosmos and the darkest corners of the human heart. Are you ready to embrace the madness and discover the eldritch attraction that awaits?

This collection of short, wild rides into the natural world; 76 different essays that evoke a tasty palette of emotions from wonder to horror to belly laughter while drawing on the best available science and the author's personal experiences in the wild. In the words of Bill McKibben, renowned environmental activist and author, "You will--I guarantee--learn from these essays. And I also guarantee that the learning will be a good deal of fun!." Dive in, and enjoy!

Sex offenders are everywhere. Even in your neighborhood. These are the people behind the crimes.

Marcus died in a game of William Tell. This baby died when the refrigerator fell. Fabian had a bottle go through his head. Skippy was rotting when they found him long dead. This baby died with a pencil through his eye. Hooked and speared like a fish. That's how Chad died. Baby buzzsaw was this kids nickname. Death by shark is how Becky's life was claimed. Simon fell down and cracked open his head. Hazardous chemicals killed little Fred. Evan was found decapitated. Sam was poisoned by one of his haters. Felix was chewed up by his pet alligator. Hunter was frozen solid deep inside the ice. Paul was given a Canadian necktie. Tommy got zapped when he put his finger in a socket. This baby carried a lighter in per pocket. Don't even axe me what happened to Drake. Christine was hugged too hard by her pet snake.

Big dogs, little dogs, short dogs, tall dogs! Learn about adjectives and different dogs in this fun little book!

This funny meme coloring book contains 20 unique illustrations including: Here come dat boiI feel it kidIs this a pigeon?PepeDogeAncient AliensRoll SafeWoman yelling at catGalaxy brainPress f to pay respectsFyre festivalDistracted boyfriendOverly attached girlfriendThis is fineArnolds fistLeo struttingAnd i oopOily lordStoner stanleySocially awkward penguin This coloring book is perfect for adults to relieve stress and have a good laugh! it's large format 8.5x11inch ensures the perfect size for coloring. Every illustration is placed on its own page to avoid bleed through. Professional matte cover, Perfect for any skill level.

Come with me and explore my crazy brain, discovering my wild attempts at going back in time, cloning dinosaurs, starting private militaries, purchasing mountains, flying to Mars, making movies, selling videogames, and playing professional baseball. You'll laugh, you'll cry, but mostly you won't care about any of it. But read it anyway, because you'll hurt my feelings if you don't!

When you hear people say, "That's what they say", have you ever wondered who these people are that say all these things? Let's find out!This book will have you laughing from beginning to end. You just might learn somethings as well. I chose 35 different idioms (phrases), some I use a lot and others I was just curious to break down and find out where they came from and to find out if we are even using them the correct way. We can't have you sounding like you don't know how to speak perfect "idioms".Idioms are not just funny, they are special. They give all of us a way to express our thoughts on a higher level. If your first language isn't English this book is going to help you speak like you blend right in. If I "go out on a limb" then it has to be "a piece of cake" to learn a new language right? I'm sure it can seem "like pulling teeth" at times. I think you can "bet your bottom dollar" thay you will be perfect in no time as long as you don't "cut corners"! Wait... What Exactly!Each idiom will be broken down into four parts.You will learn the actual meaning of the phraseYou will get to find out where it originated fromI will use it in a sentence so it makes senseThen I will give you my personal thoughts about the idiomThis book is meant to be a fun and easy read for all. Even the ones that say they hate reading, will enjoy this book. Remember I'm very sarcastic, I did "try" to hold back a bit, this time! I can't promise the same in my books to follow though.★If you could use some laughter in your life right now and I have been able to catch your attention, scroll up and hit the buy button!♥Can't wait to see you inside!

He spends his days on the very lowest rung of higher education in Southern California. He can't be seen having any of these views during the day. But in the dark, when the panini crumbs are swept into the dustbin of history, a hero emerges. It is an unlikely hero. He didn't even feel the emergence of his powers until the world around him started burning and everyone was cheering. Still, he remained on the sideline. Then three things happened: Elon Musk bought Twitter. A billionaire represents the common man more than elected officials in Washington. He could purchase the moon if he wanted to. Instead, he bought twitter. Boss move.Will Smith slapped Chris Rock. I don't know why, but many people in Los Angeles took the side of Smith and it shorted a circuit on his logic board.Biden talked about Ultra-MAGA Trump policies. You know, the ones that make America overly great again. The ones all of us should reject. People who REALLY want to Make America Great have no place in this republic. That was the message from a wisp of a shadow of a man who wasn't much to begin with. The candidate so many voted for in an unspoken contract with the mainstream media. They would promise not to call everyone "orange man" racist every night after "hollow man" won. It was a lie. A fragile lie that can be exposed if we just have the strength to stand up against it.I transformed into Ultra-Maga Man. A hero for the people. A budding, mid-level administrator of common sense. A symbol of the ages. Even though I could never show my face in public."⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️" A poor man's Greg Gutfeld - Sadie65 @Goodreads

Ratinha PerfumadaRapidinhas Explosivas - Volume 2 Explicação para o título do livro: Se há para aí uns Gatos Fedorentos, por que motivo não pode existir uma Ratinha Perfumada?Rapidinhas Explosivas - As anedotas são Rapidinhas porque são curtas! E são Explosivas porque quem as lê explode a rir! Em que estavam a pensar? Ai, essas mentes maliciosas! Já alguma vez se viram numa situação em que uma boa anedota era o melhor para desanuviar, mas não se lembravam de nenhuma? Em encontros, reuniões familiares ou com os amigos, encontrará sempre neste livro uma anedota apropriada à situação. Leve-o sempre consigo e não hesite em o utilizar em caso de emergência! Só na Internet, li mais de 30.000 anedotas para selecionar as melhores entre as melhores. Dei prioridade às curtinhas (Rapidinhas Explosivas) e deixei de parte as mais maçadoras, monótonas e sem piada (que são a maior parte). As rapidinhas aqui reunidas são provenientes das mais variadas fontes, tais como pesquisas na Internet, e-mails recebidos de amigos, histórias que fui ouvindo e anotando. Algumas das anedotas deste livro surgem pela primeira vez na língua portuguesa.

Welcome to the world of Mr. Skull, a fascinating character whose bony frame and enigmatic presence will capture your imagination! This coloring book is filled with unique illustrations of Mr. Skull in various poses and situations. With your coloring pencils and pens, you can bring Mr. Skull to life in your own creative way, giving him a personality that is entirely your own.Contains both easy/simple designs and more difficult detailed designswonderful and charming illustrationsAll designs are printed on a single side to prevent bleed through to other pagesPrinted on high quality paperPremium glossy coverA large size (8.5″ x 11″) for those little handsWhether he's puffing away on a cigarette, sitting on his throne, or just staring into the distance, Mr. Skull's distinctive appearance and piercing gaze are sure to inspire your imagination. Every page of this coloring book offers a new opportunity to explore the mysterious world of Mr. Skull, and to discover the secrets that lie within his bony frame.So grab your coloring tools and let your creativity run wild as you bring Mr. Skull to life, one page at a time!

"The Dunder Mifflin Mastermind: How to Create a Secret Alliance" is a hilariously insightful and practical guidebook that takes inspiration from the beloved TV show "The Office" to provide readers with a unique perspective on workplace dynamics. In this entertaining and informative book, readers will embark on a journey through the intricacies of forming and maintaining a secret alliance within their own workplace.With witty anecdotes, relatable stories, and clever references to "The Office," this book offers a lighthearted approach to tackling the challenges of office life. The author skillfully weaves together humor and practical advice to guide readers on a quest for adventure, collaboration, and the thrill of covert operations.Throughout the book's fifteen chapters, readers will discover the power of secret alliances in transforming the drudgery of office routines into exciting endeavors. From building trust within the alliance to strategizing mischievous pranks, from mastering stealth and subtlety to navigating the fine line between chaos and productivity, each chapter delves into a different aspect of alliance creation.With detailed instructions, humorous anecdotes, and relatable scenarios, readers will learn how to identify potential alliance members, communicate using secret codes, create distractions, and even plan a secret office retreat. The book provides practical tips and tricks for managing office politics, dealing with snitches, and inspiring loyalty among alliance members."The Dunder Mifflin Mastermind" is not only an enjoyable read but also a valuable resource for anyone seeking to inject a sense of adventure, camaraderie, and excitement into their work life. It emphasizes the importance of collaboration, trust, and creativity in building successful alliances while offering valuable insights into navigating the complexities of the modern workplace.Whether you're a fan of "The Office" or simply looking for a fresh and engaging approach to improving your work experience, this book is sure to delight and inspire. So grab your copy, unleash your inner mastermind, and embark on an unforgettable journey through the world of secret alliances, laughter, and unexpected surprises. Get ready to revolutionize your workplace and create a little mischief along the way!

Introducing The Sustenance of Relationship. This book contains topics about relationship resolution basics, dealing with yourself first, figuring out how to acquire the benefit of the question mentality, changing your fault them mentality, and lots more . It focuses of how to maintain relationship. Grab your copy now and read!

☆★☆Read for FREE with Kindle Unlimited!☆★☆Looking to impress your friends and family with some amazing card tricks? Look no further than "Card Tricks for Beginners: 2 Manuscripts in 1 - A Simple Guide to Impressing Your Friends and Family"! This book provides a simple and easy-to-follow guide for beginners who want to learn card tricks and amaze their audience. With a focus on easy tricks, this book covers everything from basic shuffles and cuts to more advanced tricks that will leave your audience speechless.In this book, you'll find: A step-by-step guide for each trick, with clear instructions and illustrations to help you master each moveEasy card tricks that require no special equipment or sleight of handTricks that are perfect for beginners and can be performed anywhere, anytimeTips for practicing and perfecting your techniqueA variety of card tricks to choose from, so you can impress your audience with a range of different tricksWhether you're a complete beginner or have some experience with card tricks, this book has something for everyone. With "Card Tricks for Beginners: 2 Manuscripts in 1 - A Simple Guide to Impressing Your Friends and Family" you'll be impressing your friends and family in no time!

For the past few years author Vincent Yanez has been submitting a weekly cartoon to his hometown newspaper, The Arizona Silver Belt. To his surprise, they often publish them. This is a collection of those cartoons.

Introducing '100 Jokes About CrossFitters' - The Ultimate Collection for CrossFit Gift Seekers and Humor Lovers!Prepare to laugh out loud with this hilarious compilation of jokes tailored for CrossFit enthusiasts and fans of fitness humor alike. This witty and entertaining book is the perfect addition to any CrossFit lover's library or as a thoughtful gift for the fitness fanatics in your life.Discover 100 side-splitting jokes that cover all aspects of CrossFit culture, including:

This might be the most disgusting thing I have written to date. I am really excited to share swamp ass.

I'm Nobody. Who Are You? Can We Save the World? is a book for those who already know that we are living in unprecedented times. It's not a book that will attempt to persuade you that the 2020 election was stolen or that the vaccines are not safe and effective.You already know this. So what now?Using memes, humor, parody and serious commentary I'm Nobody. Who Are You? Can We Save the World? explores civil disobedience, the need for massive involvement by everybody and some ideas to help fight back against the tyranny that we are facing.It's entertaining and thoughtful. The book opens with a foreword by Klaus Nutjob, there is a poignant quote by Lincoln, a parody of "A Modest Proposal," fact checking by fact checkers, removed content, FBI surveillance and a press conference. There is much more.In a review, Guttermouth from The Gutter wrote: "It's a cool gift for a fellow-dissident friend that can relate to the material. It's like reading a war journal by someone you never met that was in the same conflict as you; you mostly read it for the good feelings you have as you nod along in agreement and reinforce the neural pathways that got fired up as you lived through your particular shared-but-unshared moment of history's hell."Are you ready to save the world?

This bumper edition of the very popular book 'In France we eat sofas!' contains an even bigger list of the funniest French phrases (150+) and a picture quiz to help you check your learning with even more fun or set up a quiz to enjoy with your family and friends! Discover the great sense of humour of the French language! French like you've never learnt it at school! The French do speak a funny language indeed! Funnily enough they don't even know it! What do you think they mean when they say: 'Did you casserole her/him last night?' or 'He farts in silken sheets!'? You do not need to know any French to enjoy reading this book as the 150+ very typical phrases contained in the book are translated literally into English and introduced in context through five hilarious anecdotes (all in English too), depicting two young Frenchies' first trip to England. A glossary in both languages is also provided after each story to further assist you into guessing and enjoying the meaning of these handpicked expressions. This book is aimed at any adult reader with a good sense of humour and/or an interest in the French language and culture. The perfect gift book! There is also a version written all in French for advanced French learners ('En France on mange des sofas! Bumper edition') also available on all amazon websites. The perfect gift for College or University students of French, in need of a motivation boost! Feel free to visit the author's Facebook page (Adriano Justin Capuano Author) and Goodreads page.

It is a book of jokes that fits children and adults and can make you laugh with tears of joy.

A seriously funny sketch comedy book for serious sketch comedy fans. That's Just Wrong! is the first short collection of sketch comedy by Emmy-nominated writer Charles Horn (Robot Chicken, Robot Chicken: Star Wars). These sketches have brought the house down in numerous theaters and sketch comedy festivals. From dating to relationships to addiction to tragedy to nursery rhymes to time travel to self-pleasure, we invite you to laugh along with some of the finest and best-written sketch comedy around. What People Are Saying: "LOL!!!" "couldn't stop laughing" "knee-slapping funny" "Hilarious. Love to see sketches with such great endings."

LOOKING FOR THE PERFECT GIFT FOR DAD? IF SO, WE GOT YOU COVERED!THE ULTIMATE DAD JOKE BOOK - WITH NEVER SEEN BEFORE JOKES! JOKES ON YOU DAD!!A hilarious Dad Joke Book to celebrate a sense of humour that is so bad its great! JOKES ON YOU DAD is filled with the best jokes you will find! From cheesy one-liners to puns that are so corny they are actually a-maize-ing! This book truly has it all!FEATURESOver 200 HILARIOUSLY CRINGEY Dad JokesPerfect gift for Father's Day, Birthdays and ChristmasHours of laughter

Sadder than You is a true to life comic strip loosely based on the stupid things that my buddies and I did, said, saw, dreamed about, had nightmares about, had hallucinations about, or just thought happened during our crazy and hazy party years.You probably knew people like us and we are truly sorry for the physical and emotional scars that we have left behind.

Motherhood is tough. You'll laugh or cry, so you might as well laugh.I STILL Just Want to Pee Alone is the third book in the New York Times bestselling I Just Want to Pee Alone series! Motherhood is STILL the toughest - and STILL the funniest - job you'll ever love. We know that raising kids is hard work. The pay sucks, your boss is a tyrant, and the working conditions are pitiful - TGIF means nothing to a mother! You said it before and you're saying it again, "I STILL just want to pee alone!" I STILL Just Want to Pee Alone is ANOTHER collection of hilarious and heartwarming essays from 40 MORE of the most kick ass mom bloggers on the web. Including: People I Want to Punch in the Throat Bad Parenting Moments Let Me Start By Saying The Sh*tastrophy. Featuring essays like: It's Not Pee. It's You. Open Letter to My Daughter: My Mother was Right and You Should Think I Am, Too. And Then God Laughed Flames, Knives, and Fear: A Family Dinner Let's Piss Off the Babies

Best Joke Book for Kids is a book of short jokes, that are guaranteed age appropriate. Funny jokes, Knock Knock jokes, Kids Jokes. Jokes for Kids, Best Joke Book for Kids is styled for as kids grow older they find certain jokes less and less funny. This means you have to come up with age appropriate jokes to keep them entertained. Jokes are more than just for laughs. They also stimulate thought and educate. That does not mean you go stiff on the kids, far from it. You want jokes that are funny, corny and have some substance. Usually the really good jokes will give even you the tickles. Kids jokes, with over 200 funny jokes, this will keep the kids, and adult laughing for some time.

Get ready to unleash your inner dad with this hilarious collection of cat and dog-themed jokes! From paw-some puns to howl-arious one-liners, this book has over 500 dad jokes that will have you giggling like a kitten and wagging your tail like a happy pup. Perfect for cat and dog lovers, this book is filled with groan-worthy jokes that will make you roll your eyes and laugh out loud at the same time. Whether you're a dad, a cat person, a dog lover, or just someone who appreciates a good pun, this book will have you covered with its endless supply of feline and canine humor. So sit back, relax, and let the dad jokes begin!

This story is about Dr. Von Gleichstein, the famed quantum physicist seen in "The Time Saving Agency" (book 2 in the Quantum Series by Christina Engela) and his little dog, Vluffy... and some mutant cockroaches, violins and a few - er... "ozzer sings". Dr. Gleichstein is a quantum physicist - and as everyone knows by now, quantum physics is a bit like ordinary physics, except that you spend a little more time looking for your eyebrows! Vluffy is a little gray dog who wears a flame-proof asbestos doggy jacket, and spends a lot of time hiding under things to avoid being vaporized by the Doktor's occasional mishaps - and in their home, even the mouse holes have blast-proof doors! But something lurks inside the house with them... something that has grown and changed and mutated from all the latent radiation and funky quantumness that has leaked into the house... nasty, vicious, aggressive two-headed mutant cockroaches... aargh! Even the mice have packed up their mousy things and left for greener pastures... They even chase poor Vluffy down the hall - whatever would the neighborhood dogs say about that if they found out? Oh, the shame! Even the Doktor is dismayed by this new development... after all, not even tinned food is safe anymore! Something has to be done about this, of course... and the Doktor is just the ornery hombre to do it... and so he clears his whiteboard for action! Vluffy hopes this can be solved without resorting to violins. Bang, Splat! is a "children's story for adults" - an endearing little illustrated tale set in the Quantum Series universe created by Christina Engela.

Dans ce second tome, on découvre qui est Coco Chanoune dans la suite de ses aventures.Tout se met en place à l'insu de son plein gré, comme l'aurait si bien dit en son temps l'autre roi de la pédale.L'action (très filmique) est prétexte à des situations improbables et tout à fait inédites.Et surtout, on découvre la manière plus que surprenante au cours de laquelle il se fait élire député pour 12 partis politiques différents sans que personne n'ait à y redire !Un roman burlesque qui se lit d'une traite, où pour un peu la fiction serait sur le point de rejoindre la réalité.Particulièrement imaginatif, Claude HAJOS s'essaye dans tous les genres.Sous sa plume, il met en scène les aventures complètement loufoques de Coco Chanoune, un personnage unique en son genre.Le seul en France capable de réaliser l'exploit de se faire élire député pour 12 partis politiques en même temps !Le seul également capable d'obtenir 7 nominations ministérielles et toujours en même temps !Mais vous allez voir que ça ne s'arrête pas là..

The world looks different a year after the dead rose from their graves. Survivors live in walled enclaves while the zombies roam freely in the wasteland. John, Chris and Erik have made their home in the enclave of Haven and earn their keep in town by scavenging for supplies outside the walls. These excursions bring them face-to-face with grubby urchins, deadly warlords and hordes of the undead. But not all threats lie beyond the walls. The dads are beginning to wonder if they can trust the people in charge. Things aren't looking good and the longer the end of the world drags on, the more danger they're sure to find themselves in.

Have you ever felt like you needed some time alone? Maybe a little time to yourself?Then pick up a copy of the second volume in the New York Times bestselling I Just Want to Pee Alone series! Don't get us wrong, we love the men in our lives - we do (most of the time). It's just that sometimes we would like them to go away. Not forever or anything like that. Just for an hour ... or a day ... or a weekend. We want some time to ourselves to read a good book or take a walk or do anything other than try to make a dent in the never ending mound of dirty clothes that keeps piling up on his side of the bed. We just want to be alone. All alone. Is that too much to ask? I Just Want to Be Alone is a collection of humorous essays from 37 of the most Super Cool Lady Writers you'll find on the web. Including: People I Want to Punch in the Throat Baby SideburnsAK Turner My Husband Ate All My Ice CreamBad Parenting Moments. Read hilarious essays like: Open Letter To My Son (Or: Your Mother's Top 10 List of Ways Not to Be a Douchebag Husband)Exploding With Love, LiterallyRomance is OverratedLife With the Thin GuyDear Magnolia, Should I Marry This Man?