Bøker av Lotus Rose

You've been misled. Lewis Carroll didn't reveal the whole story... Alice never left Wonderland. She's trapped. She's angry. And she wants revenge. If you're a fan of twisted fairy tales, you'll love this dementedly funny series, brought to you by the author of Dorothy vs. Alice. The truth is not what you were led to believe. It wasn't all "just a dream." It's a nightmare. A nightmare she can't escape, where formerly pleasant characters throw her unhappy unbirthday parties to torment her, while others like to make her cry so they can lick her tears. But one day after years of this unpleasantness, she loses her heart. Literally. Well, technically somebody steals it. And she has to get it back. By any means necessary. And it's a lot easier to be ruthless now that she's heartless. Alice is fed up with all the losers of Wonderland, from the sadistic Queen of Hearts to the goofy Mad Hatter to the bloodthirsty Cheshire Cat. And she's tired of being so sweet and innocent, with all her dimples. She used to be a preteen, but today is her 13th birthday, and she'll be singing "unhappy birthday" loudly as she delivers violent justice! Yeah, she used to be so sweet you could die. Well, now they all shall die...literally. It may be 1865, but Alice is about to go medieval. She will have her heart returned to her even if she has to kill all the citizens of Wonderland one by one...

Either love her or die. . . Alice has regained her heart and it's thumping in her chest. But she must not kill again, for with each additional murder, her heart grows blacker, her thoughts, once sweet and innocent, grow more vengeful and cruel, and her tears, once magical, grow more poisonous. She wants to set things right and reincarnate Humpty Dumpty and the Caterpillar and the Tweedle twins. But she seems to have a bad habit of killing that she can't seem to break. She doesn't want to kill them all over again, but sometimes these Wonderland idiots are really asking for it, don't you think? By the author of The Poniworld Chronicles and SinEaster.

Queen Malice and her team set off toward Jabberwock Valley, where they hope to find a new body for their friend and teammate, the woefully decapitated Jabberwock. Their journey will no doubt be fraught with peril, but Malice is more concerned with the crushing withdrawals she's going through, due to running out of black rose. She hopes she can keep it together, despite her bouts of viciousness from a malfunctioning heart. Any further breakdowns could lead to very awkward social situations. And the team is stressed enough already, what with the agonies of a dramatic love triangle, and the threat of a powerful chief who wants to capture Malice, for reasons that aren't entirely clear yet. Can they arrive at Jabberwock Valley in one piece? And without Sleepy B committing a childish mistake requiring rescue? Or without the Cheshire Cat offending any of the team with his sharp tongue? Or without Malice breaking either the Mad Hatter's or Humpty's heart? No doubt something is bound to happen. Malice just hopes she can get through the whole nerve wracking mess without having to resort to any black rose "substitutes" along the way.

In part 3 of the trilogy, Alice wins the Vorpal Fist, a weapon whose special power is to rip out the hearts of those who love the person wearing it. Oh, and there's a Russian roulette tea party and a shadow under a rainbow guillotine too! But here's the thing: everything has gone weird. Is it still 1865 up in here? Because Wonderland seems to have suddenly gone scifi and I daresay, steampunk... This all occurs during a twisted life-sized board game Malice the Heartless and Alice the Blackhearted find themselves trapped in. Who will win? And will Alice finally become a stealer of hearts and turn the tables on everyone?

Malice and the team have arrived at Jabberwock Valley, where they hope to thwart the Snark's diabolical plans. The times of prophesy are at hand, when great changes are in store for the jabberwocks. Soon, they may come under the rule of a new leader who shall lead them forward in conquest. They may even regain their ability to fly, if Malice and her team are successful. During the course of their adventures, Sleepy B seeks the truth about her mysterious past, while Jabby strives to regain his honor and his beloved vorpal blade. The two also further explore what exactly their strange relationship means. One thing is for certain. Lots of things are going to change very soon. The days of prophesy are at hand.

The decapitated Jabberwock's head is still functional--he just needs a new body. 15-year-old Queen Malice wants to help her buddy, Jabby, as she likes to call him. And so she plans a quest to Jabberwock Valley, where most of the other jabberwocks live. But Jabby isn't the only one they must help. Wonderland itself is in danger, because a creature known as the Snark threatens to reunite the monster tribes and revive a realm known as Woeland. So Malice works on assembling a team. Of course, the Mad Hatter, Humpty, and the Cheshire Cat will tag along. But the Knight still has a crippling fear of little girls. There are other complications. 11-year-old Sleeping Beauty wants to go on the quest as well. But most jabberwocks hate little girls. Jabberwock mothers even sing their babies "little-girls-goodbyes," which are like lullabies, except gorier. Malice also struggles with the intoxicating effects of the black rose. She finds herself taking more of the flower each day, and it's becoming harder to stop. Will they be able to thwart the Snark? And who is the mysterious "secret admirer" who sends Malice creepy notes via pigeon? And can she prove to the Knight that she no longer has any "little girlness" inside of her, by going through a series of the Knight's anti-little-girl challenges? Because it's the only way he'll join the team. And they'll need a lot of help if they ever hope to stop the Snark and survive their journey to Jabberwock Valley.