Bøker av Santiego Rivers

Heavenly Father, it's me again. On my knees, head bowed, holding my heart in my hands. I come to you with one request. Please help me navigate this crazy dating mess. I am way over my head and drowning from the stress! There was a time when dating, getting to know someone, falling in love, and staying in love was easy / more manageable.As it relates to staying in love, once you have found that one person, it was not easy because it was easy; it was easy because there was a time when people valued each other instead of trying to use one another for their benefit. Times and people have changed drastically regarding the importance of morals and values. People now focus on judging each other instead of trying to love one another. I blame most of the change in people based on their lack of authentic communication with each other. Most people know communication is the key to a relationship, but nowadays, people post about communication's importance instead of living it. In this book, I will discuss my journey into the dating world and navigating through the dreadful abyss to find the one, and if not the one, just someone to have an adult conversation with. I will share how keeping an open mind and heart throughout my journey was tested at every step of the way.

There came a point in my life when I realized I was on what seemed to be the fast track to reaching my goals. What ultimately changed my life was when I realized what it would take to achieve them. Every new level brought forth a new devil to remind me that if I were ever going to reach the top level, I would need to transform myself into a daredevil. In that moment, I realized that the higher you get, the more significant the adversity you will face, be it people or other things. Experience taught me what no book or teacher ever could. When God favors you, you are also selected by the devil. I had to understand that as I faced adversity in my life. The Devil does not attack his own, so I learned to accept the adversity I face as a blessing.Before that acceptance, I often returned to the lower levels instead of moving on to the next level because I was unwilling to face the Devil waiting at the next level on my journey. I was running from myself because I lacked the courage to face myself and the changes it would take to reinvent myself at the next level of my life.My fears kept me from moving forward for a very long time. Our fear of failure makes us fail, but we fail because we fail to change. I eventually learned that if you want to change, you must change, or everything will remain the same. In this book, you will discover what I had to uncover that was buried within myself and finally gave me the courage to encourage myself to keep moving forward. I learned the hard way but eventually realized that facing opposition lets you know you're headed in the right direction.

How do you know when to leave the people you have become comfortable around? The answer to that question is when you decide to ask yourself that vital question. It took me a long time to understand and accept the following quote, but when I finally did. It allowed me to make some difficult and important decisions in my life. "Even Loyalty has an expiration date." In this book, you will discover why I felt the need to disconnect with people I have known most of my life, for the chance to reconnect with someone who could help change my life. (Myself) Doing what is best for you will disappoint many people. Be sure that you are not one of them.

I have been through many stages in my life that required me to grow in different areas of my life like never before.I was forced to make many decisions and sacrifices in my life that required me to adjust to my core. The broken version of me humbled me in ways that required me to disconnect from anything and everyone until I reconnected with myself and God because only he could reveal the many cracks in my façade. The healing version of me required me to be open, honest, and transparent with the two people. I could never be dishonest with God and myself. I had to admit, submit, and repent every transgression to improve myself.I now find myself adjusting to the next version of myself required to allow me to continue to grow.I was coming out of survival mode and learning to live! To live, you must be at peace with both the broken and healed version of you. The broken version of you should not live beyond your healed version.The healed version of you must give way to the version of you that looks and accepts that life is meant to be lived in the present, not dwelling in the past. In this book, you will discover how this version of me is okay with you judging, doubting, misunderstanding, and gossiping about me because what it took to get myself here made me face all my fears.I hope that reading this book allows you the courage to face yours.

On the outside, looking in or seeing me at certain milestones in my life, most people would assume I have always had a wonderful life. Your opinion deems the reality of what it takes to live my life. I have had to climb many mountains and hills, including sacrificing things I did not want to give up just for the motivation to push me past the hesitations that would have prevented me from taking the next step on my way up. I have walked miles that most people would not bother taking the first step simply because of the dangers that come with each one. I sacrificed time and energy to work rather than for fun. I fought hard to stand where I am, but this is not my destination. Although I do not look like everything I have been through, I have been through making excuses that I find to be useless when it comes to achieving my dreams. People ask me why I push so hard to pursue my dreams. The answer is simple. What I fear more than death are the things that die within you while you are alive. When it comes to success, I am built for it! I constantly had to remind myself not to allow my comfort to be the discomfort stopping the blessings God had planned for my life. So, I kept moving forward. I did it mad, sad, angry, upset, and even with indifferent feelings because it did not make a difference. I am built for this! In this book, you will discover what happens when you are willing to make being uncomfortable the one thing you find comfort in when it comes to achieving your goals. Nothing will change your life until you change.

Not all fathers can be a dad, and not all mothers have what it takes to be a mom. We are often given titles in hopes that we will, with time, fulfill them. From my perspective, a child needs both parents in their lives. We do not need the father trying to play the part of the mother, and we do not need the mother trying to be the child's father. When we become parents, we do not realize the impact our absence will have on a child's life and how their future becomes their sacrifice because many of them are still dealing with their trauma from childhood. Far too often, we pass on generational pain because many of us still suffer subconsciously from the trauma of our past that remains. Unknowingly, we continue the same pattern we learned as children that maybe our parents were taught that if we do not break the cycle, our children will cause the same pain and hurt to their children. From my experience, hurt people hurt others. Admittedly, I do not have all the answers, but I know that the changes we are unwilling to make will cause us to make irreversible mistakes in our children's lives. The intention of this book is not to discuss why you should learn how to choose a suitable mate before having children. The purpose of this book is to address the importance of a dad in a child's life from a male's perspective. You do not need to be the perfect dad. It would help your children if you were willing to invest the time to deserve the title. Dad's Matter in a child's life.

Some chapters of my life brought me sorrow. There are also chapters of my life that brought me pain. Through it all, every chapter of my life assured me I could survive the rain.If one quote could summarize every chapter in my life, it would be the following."No one will ever know the violence it took to become this gentle."God, please keep working on me until my mind, heart, and soul becomes a reflection of you.In this book, allow me to show how great you are when a man is willing to swallow his pride before it swallows him.I have learned the hard way, but I have learned that sometimes you must make decisions that hurt your heart but eventually heal your soul.

One of the most valuable lessons life has taught me was that my dreams are my responsibility.Before making myself accountable for the good and not-so-good moments in my life, I blamed everyone for me not having or being where I wanted to be in my life.During my storms, I forgot who I was, but more importantly, I forgot to whom I belonged.Once my mind came to grips with what my soul knew, I was determined to use everything others meant to break me to make me stronger.With pen in hand, I began to write. I wrote about the good, the bad, and even those indifferences that made me pause and think.These short notes gave me something to think about and reminded me that God is always in control, even when it feels like my life is out of control.I had to learn and accept that if it's big enough to worry about, it's big enough to pray about. So I combined my faith and hard work into a book I present to you.Little Notes to Myself

From the moment we met, my mind started to accept things only my heart truly understood. (I am in love with you)I knew I wanted everything with you and nothing without you from the moment I met you.The only way this dream of mine would be possible was if I changed my life, so I changed my life. There wasn't, is, or will ever be any sacrifice I won't make to one day have you as my wife.I speak from my lips to your soul when I say; I want to make the rest of my life the best with you. It will always be us against the many; you, him, and I.When times get tough, I promise - promise I will only turn to you and him because I am so into you.You move me in ways that I need to be shaken.

I had to lose myself to find myself finally. It took me being totally by myself to discover and accept my happiness depended on me and no one else. I was tired of being tired. I was ready to change, but I needed to change everything and anything that was not helping me to be the change I needed for my life. To change my life, I had to become intentional with my actions so they would match my words. I had to release everything that was holding me back. My pride, anger, my fears, doubts, and insecurities that cost me years of my life I can never get back. What I lost in the process could never compare to what I gained by being willing to endure. This book will tell you what it took to begin my journey by removing the anchors I allowed to hold me back in my life. I hope you find something in it you can apply to yours.

Dear Beautiful, I need you to know the next time you look into my eyes, I promise I won't look away. Also, the next time we are together, I promise to tell you why I need you to stay, In my life forever.Being with you makes me feel like I am living a lifetime in a day.I confess I have been in love before but finding you have made me sure it was your love I should have waited for. I can't change my past, but luckily It has taught me lessons. Those lessons were a blessing because they assured me that I would not need to be second-guessing when the right woman entered my life. So I plan to spend each day convincing you why you should do me the honor of being my wife.I need you by my side regardless of the weather. But ultimately, I want our love to be what keeps us together.I digress.I don't want to rush to the end. Instead, I want to take my time and tell you how my love for you all began. In this book, you will discover what makes a man change, even when changing is the last thing on his mind. You are why I left my past behind to focus on the woman God ordained to be mine.

Let it be known that I did not build my faith in the shallow waters. Instead, I forged my belief in the Most High within the deep seas. Therefore, I had to apply hard work and sacrifice to get to where I am.Going through every obstacle and roadblock is what it took to get me where I am happy with my life! No, I am nowhere near my destination, but every day I am getting closer than I was the day before because I finally understood the assignment from God. I stopped praying for better days and started renewing my faith during the "reality check" nights, which had broken me but did not stop me from continuing my fight.

Being alone should never make you feel lonely. Who you are when you're by yourself is the real you. The person you try to be around others or in a relationship is not the real you.Highlight reels on social media is not the real you. The person you are offline, away from everyone else, is the real version of you. We hide in crowds, becoming the expectations of others while ignoring the expectations of ourselves because we never take the time to learn about ourselves when we are by ourselves.I spent many years of my life jumping in and out of relationships trying to find someone to make me happy, not realizing the happiness I wanted and needed was always within me.Our happiness is our responsibility! It took some time for me to learn and accept that, but when God forced me to take some time for myself, I rediscovered why the healed version of me in someone's life is better than the broken version of me.The broken version of me caused bloodshed in my relationship with others because my unhealed jagged edges caused wounds. Relationships with others will never be successful until we improve our relationship with ourselves and God.In this book, you will discover what happens when you take the time to pause, reflect, process, and heal the parts of you to become the best version of yourself. It was not easy for me, but it was worth it.